Pre- Marital Sex - Yes or N0?

Sex is one of the many ways of expressing love. Sex is the very reason of our existence. Sex is the very reason why you and I am here. Sex !Sex! Sex - an overhyped word  done by all but spoken by none.Sex is treated as a taboo in many countries. In this 21st century when we have reached Mars, we are still toying with the idea of Pre- Marital Sex - Yes or No! Before the Moral Police lashes out against my blog let me tell you I am not someone who is promoting pre-marital sex neither am I someone who is against it. But who decides what is right or wrong ? Who decides pre- marital sex is  a sin? The spineless society? or  You or is it me ? .Are we leaving our decisions to the spineless society which acts inert when every hour a girl gets raped -ie. sex without her consent or forced sex or you/me? who reads the very news of rape in the paper every morning and does nothing about it. The very society who bans sex education in schools and we do nothing about it. One thing that all must to come to terms with is we weren't born as a result of cross pollination. Our parents did it and we will do it too sometime in future may be before marriage or after marriage.

Source: www.thelocal.se

Whether its right to do IT(using the pronoun because by now am expecting activists outside my home for the overusage of the word SEX) before marriage or after marriage is a matter of choice which must be left open for the individuals involved to decide.I and my partner should have the freedom to decide when and how i should express my love to my partner.  Sex is the need of every human being just like food ,clothing and shelter.  And every single individual needs the same. You are not a whore if you do it before marriage,with whom you do and what all you do is again your choice.Its just like i wanted a new jeans , i brought it. Sex is the very basic need of an individual - this is something I need not explain being a citizen of the country with the second highest population in the world. Obviously all these people just didn't drop down one day  from the sky. They all did ITeither before or after marriage. Then what difference does it make if you do it before or after marriage. Marriage is just an announcement to the whole world indirectly that these two people involved in the marriage will be sleeping around together henceforth.I am yet to come to terms with the fact that how parents can send in their daughters with an unknown person one fine day to sleep around and be totally dead against if the daughters do the same thing before marriage.How can a marriage decide what is right or wrong. As per my opinion , Sex is something which is a very personal thing in a couple's life and no one should have  the right to interfere in a couple's life and decide what is right or wrong. It is totally a couple's view and their decision how they decide to take their relationship to the next level.If the question is about getting dumped after pre marital sex; there are many  cases where in people get married and dump their brides after the first night or the over hyped "Suhag rat " in India( first night after wedding).But the same issue can also be looked at from a different point of view. Pre marital sex will leave no surprises after marriage. No excitement of the first touch, first kiss , first hug ;nothing new left to experience after marriage. Again i would repeat its the decision of the couple as to what has to be done.Sex  isn't a crime . So the question of whether doing it before or after would be right or wrong doesn't arise at all.Sex is a beautiful expression of love. Dont criminalize it.This post is written as part of a contest YES or NO to Pre-Marital Sex on Indiblogger.Poonaam Uppal ,the Love Goddess unravels the various secrets of love in her book – A Passionate Gospel of True Love : A Mystical True Love Story. Read on....

Book Review : Nirbhaya And The Other Who Dared

 When I was asked to review the  book, the first reason why  I decided to review the book was the name Nirbhaya . I thought this was one such book where in again the plight of women would be described. Nirbhaya the name will always remain an epitome of the atrocities of men against women.Nirbhaya will always remind us of someone who succumbed to the atrocities of men. But this book came out to be different.  Kusum Chopra has empowered the name Nirbhaya and has portrayed women as very strong  protagonists in each and every story. Instead of portraying the characters as someone getting suppressed , the writer sends out a strong message with  the strong characters that its time to speak out, and act against the atrocities of men. The writer has beautifully etched out several stories where in she tries to convey the following messages

- that its fine to look out for sex elsewhere for women , as it is  for men.Looking out for sex outside doesn’t make you a slut.

- women have equal rights on their parent’s property as men.

- A widow neednot waste her entire life taking care of her in laws. She should be allowed to lead a life of her own.

- Divorce isn’t the end of life. And divorce isn’t a  women’s fault. 

-that it is necessary to fight against an alcoholic and abusive  husband.

Several stories which portray women as bold ,courageous and their battle against the orthodox rules of the society form the main crux of this book.

Pros :

A different outlook totally , and me being a feminist myself this book is a welcome change  compared to so many books which show women in poor light.

This book made me think on all the topics highlighted in the book as to what would have been my reaction or how would I have behaved in all such instances.

This book is the need of the hour and may be an answer today to  most of the problems women are silently facing today even in metropolitan cities.

Con:

 Some stories have a confusing start , and I had to read twice to understand about whom the story was revolving around. At Rs.250 I feel the book is overlypriced.

Overall:  

The  book makes up for an interesting read during tea time and will keep you engrossed.

Rating : 3/5