Apr 16, 2011
The war has begun
Coz things have been outdone
You treat me like a door mat
Believe Me I aint anymore taking that
I talk what is true
and thats what leaves you blue
You want me to be like you
I wanna know !!what are you??
I have never minced ma word
And my frankness leaves your speech slurred
I know I can
And please!!! I don't need a man
I have reached here without your support
Makes me proud your help was never sought.
You never Stood for yourself first
That proves you are simply the worst.
One thing is for sure
I am someone whom you can never lure
I am not taking things lying down anymore
And trust me ,very soon am showing you the door
The rebel in me would never die
It doesn't matter even if i would have to cry
There is no stopping anymore
No looking back and pondering any more.
My tears don't mean I am weak
They just make me stronger week by week.
Suppressing someone is easy,
And it comes easy to people like you who are cheesy
What makes me laugh is that you are still insecure
Lost aimelessly in life and still unsure
Its high time for you to know
I aint going to bend and bow
You get respect when you are worth it
For you i Can only say, dont even expct it
Its going to be one-on-one
And trust me am going to spare none.
It doesn't matter whether i win or lose
But I aint bending down to your ideas and views
The game is about to begin
And its not about who lose or win
its just to let you know
Am never gonna bow
Am just neva gonna bow
Apr 9, 2011
Oh How much i adored them!! how much i cared for them!!! They are no longer with me..They no longer adorn me.. They were with me since so many years but now they left me this sunday...The separation is too much to bear :(
Confused?? Oh, am talking about my nails, my pretty nails which looked something like this...(yes yes see down :( )
Hmm sigh!!! Now this paragraph is dedicated to all the guys in the world( That includes my guitar sir too!!!).When you have a girlfriend you expect her to have such stylish chic looking hands and beautiful nails to adorn them.But do you ever bother to know how much pain does it take to keep them in that way??(Do You?? dumb heads!!) Ohkk controlling my emotions I now begin to tell you my NAIL story which is a standing epitome of perseverance and hard work. I was born with those dull nails which never grew.During my school days the stylish hot gals of my class would sport such beautiful long maintained nails ; and me being a geek (typical the ones whom people used to call "double battery") would think of nails only when the results used to be out that too for biting them to avoid tension and anxiety.Due to my nail biting habit i never had to cut my nails before the physical examinations because they never grew or rather i never let them grow.
When i joined my college i again had a set of hip hep gals in my class who flaunted their beautiful nails which would always be painted with the hottest colours to the utmost perfection.Seeing those beautiful nails all i would do is start biting my nails again( yeah !! i never ever improved ).Then finally i pledged to grow my nails without biting them.I negotiated with my stomach and nails and came to a conclusion that one hand will be sacrificed to my sharp tooth every week but the other remains untouched.Controlling my anxiety pangs i let my left hand nails to grow..Oh how lovely they looked as they grew up.I still remember the first sight of them growing up.I was flooded with emotions.They were my babies.I used to paint them weekly.They had to bear the protests of my strict disciplined dad and my all time cribbing mom.But they stood fearless and shiny as ever .I loved them for this.They were an example of my will power and no doubt i was extremely proud of them.They were complimented wherever they went and my face used to glow with pride.In parties i used to purposely hold glasses with my left hand so that people could see them and feel envy.Everything that i held was in left hand.I have always been an expressive female and ma hands have talked more than my mouth.They have always been expressing something or the other.After the nails grew my left hand worked more than the right hand .I wanted the world to see my nails..But now they are gone...Oh those moments i am going to miss them.
Now y am i going to miss them ..This week i was gifted a guitar and i was so damn excited to learn the guitar.I went and joined classes and today was the first day of my class.My sir was a young fellow who plays the guitar amazingly,My first class started and the moment i held the guitar my sir had a look on the left hand.I tried to hide them but he was like " u need to cut them".I was like "what ?????".He looked at my nails as if they were his biggest enemies embarrassing me even more.He saw the disbelief on my face and he was like "So what grow on the other hand?".I was about to burst out "So what ???? Dude u don't know it takes so much pain to grow them.It takes years to be maintained this way".I tried to avoid what he was saying and every expression on my face said"No!! don't do this to me ..Take extra fees but not my nails"
But i knew they had to go because i realized i wasn't able to play the notes on my guitar .Nails would come and go but my classes they wont :( Even minutes before i left the class he said "Chop them off!!" I was like "How Inhuman!!"...Finally this evening i cut them and they are gone forever.......
Good bye Dahlings!! my heart cried out.......
Now Waiting Impatiently for the white pearlies to grow on my right hand......
Apr 7, 2011
As usual in the weekend i was out on one of my several missions which is sometimes shopping ,going for classes etc etc. and i boarded a rickshaw (I hate walking alone!!!) and was seated cursing the heat ,cursing why the rickshaw driver had to wait for so many customers.Obviously all questions were answered with "Myadam(Madam) mehanga padta hai sirf do logo ko leke jane ko(which means Madam its costly to take only two customers on a ride to the station) and i was like as if you are the only one whos affected by the inflation bug.There i sat all grumpy making faces when suddenly i heard someone asking the driver " Tumhi east madhe janar ka??"(will you go to the east direction?) and my driver all happy that he could pocket more money said a YES with all his excitement.I was least interested to even see who was boarding the rickshaw.Five minutes passed away and the rick still didnot move.I came back from my dream world and i saw that our third customer was someone special.
The fellow who had asked my driver was on a cycle with a kid(this was something which I could see from the place where i was seated) and i was like he has got a cycle why he needs a rick.The next thing that i see is he pulled his cycle ahead very close to my rick and a man just crawled in.I was shocked to see this fellow crawling in to the rickshaw.The sight made me felt weak.He had no legs!!.
Finally my "inflation bug infected" driver with his moron kind of smile started the journey.The second customer was an old uncle who was very much interested in our third customer.The third customer i.e the fellow who had no legs was someone in his early thirties and quite young.He introduced himself as Ramesh.Our uncle then started talking to him and I was also a bit more alert as to what they where talking.
Now the conversation went this way:
Oldie Uncle(Its justified to call him Oldie because his hair was all salt and no pepper.)
: what happened did u meet with an accident ? Where u a driver?
Ramesh: Yeah i was a driver but didnot meet with an accident.Got some kind of fever and the doctor gave me some injection which spoilt my life.
Oldie Uncle: What happened actually?
Ramesh: The dosage was wrong and it affected one of my legs and the doctor ended up cutting both.I have no relatives and by the time I realised i was limbless.The man who came to drop me is the only help i have
Oldie (in a defensive mood): You didnt file a case??
Ramesh :By the time we filed a case against him he just absconded somewhere.shut his dispensary ..Still no idea as to where he is and I cant move around in courts with this condition.
(My heart just melted ,as also i was super angry on that dumb idiotic doctor who did this to him)
Oldie:So now where are you going.?
Ramesh: I work in a school .I do all the petty jobs there and earn a decent income which is sufficient for me to live.I am Limbless but i dont want to beg or bother anyone.I have lost my legs but other body parts are still working fine enough to take care of myself.
By the time he said this ,I got down at my destination from the rickshaw.But that was an eyeopener.He just taught me a lesson which i would have never learnt if taught in a proper way.There are millions of people in our country and a considerable percentage of them beg ,borrow and steal for their income .Majority of them are fully well built with all their body parts functioning.If there would have been atleast 10 Ramesh's the condition would have been different.We sympathise on the handicapped people.Its not their inability that affects them,its our sympathy that makes them even more handicapped.And kudos to the institution who have created such doctors who spoil innocent lives.Hats off to the authorities of the institutions who take students on the basis of donation rather than merit...Do not worry your chance will also come. When you bring out 100 more doctors like this,you leave yourself with no other option than be treated by them.
Ramesh had so much enthusiasm,zeal to work and an undying spirit in him and his respect for himself which was commendable.That made me wonder what if he had both the legs.