My Take On Relationships – Take 2

Recently attended a break up party of one of the acquaintances,who’s bf was caught cheating with another colleague of hers. I feel proud that I played a bit in bringing the whole issue in front of her. What followed was the 4year old relationship going kaput and the 2year relationship with the other chick expectedly going kaput!. What I expected was an emotional melodrama .But much to my surprise nothing of that sorts happened. What followed was a party and peace…Oh how do I forget bitching… ;)

Another one friend who ended up her relationship recently was also seen putting up a brave front and using some well deserved adjectives for her partner and yeah it did tickle our ribs ..

One married friend who lives in with her estranged husband coolly passes off her concerns about her future put by her relatives saying “ As of now I get to live for free in Mumbai what else can I ask for”.

I guess Gone are the days when girls would weep and wail over a relationship gone awry. No crying,no depression gals are emerging stronger out of their broken relationships and coming out much better than before ever.I wouldn’t deny the fact that there are still a certain percentage who would wail and weep over a broken relation.. Does weeping over spoilt milk makes sense..? May be this is the policy the new generation gals seems to be adopting. As also when there are many fishes out there in the pond why sob for a particular one .. Right ? ;)

Sobbing and weeping only doesn’t indicate you gave your heart and soul to a particular relationship.So concluding that a female wasn’t serious about her relationship just because she didn’t weep and wail and cry out to the world doesn’t make sense ..rather its utter nonsense. Girls are now putting forth a strong front. As also when the partner is found guilty of cheating , gals are not waiting and weeping.They are moving on in life which I think is the best solution out of an abusive and disrespectful relationship.

What I found lovely was the amazing spirit to bend the rules and come out of an abusive or a relationship without freedom. It’s the courage I salute where gals have decided to put a stop to the ongoing emotional trauma ,give a damn about what the society would think or rather thinks.. But according to me does the society actually think about you.. ? Does it.. If yes then the amount of torture women are subjected to would have never occurred.

So in case you in a relationship devoid of freedom,walk out of it.. because its high time you think about yourself …

My Take On Relationships :

This post has been chosen by Blog Adda for their Tuesday Tangy Picks. Thank you Blogadda.

Recently read in the newspaper, a 73 year old couple battling for divorce. They have their kids who are well settled, have their grand kids too… but still they have been battling it out in the court because they just can’t stand each other. The court tried to make peace but then both the sides refused to live in together again. This may not be the first case or something new but then it really made me think hard, what is that you want in a relationship.

After 40-50 years of staying together and bringing up kids together, finally what would have happened that made them grew apart. I wondered does it take 40-50 years to know your partner?I wondered as to what could be the actual reason for the same. Either the problem would have been right from the start but then they would have compromised for their kids or their family(typical Indian mentality!!!) or they have lost the mutual understanding which is an important ingredient of every relation.

I have had a friend who would always say “When I’m willing to cook her chicken tikkas for dinner and chocolate mousse for breakfast-in-bed, she should atleast be beautiful” I would try explaining things to him that beauty would fade away but then no use. Is it beauty that would make the relation grow stronger.? What if she is beautiful and suspicious of every activity of yours?? Does it even sound good?? Forget staying with her then!!!!!I feel in a relationship the person appears beautiful in the first two years of courtship or may be 3years of marriage and sexual intimacy but then in the long run what makes the couple  beautiful or your partner beautiful is how the person has been a strength throughout the journey. Fights are common in every relation but then the way you fought over small things guides you throughout the journey. If in the first fight you end up breaking vessels and jars ,the time is not far when you end up breaking your  hearts.

I believe at the age of 73 what I would want is peace, an understanding partner(doesn’t matter if he looks the worst then) and it wouldn’t even matter if he doesn’t cook  chicken tikkas for me.I would rather reminisce about my wonderful moments with him. For me spending time more together would be the best option rather than moving court. I believe the couple lacked the basic understanding and that is the reason they wanted a divorce. If it would have been the society that they bothered about then even now they wouldn’t have taken such a step.

The basic thing that is missing in most of the relationships these days is trust and understanding. Something that I believe in very strongly, be with someone who understands you, who accepts you the way you are. It doesn’t matter what the world thinks about your decision. They are no one to decide anyways .Don’t get into a marriage because someone wants you to. And don’t stay in an abusive relation just because someone wants you to. I may sound selfish but then nothing hurts more mentally and physically than being in an abusive relation. Be in a relationship with someone who has got the basic understanding of what you want. 

Trust me!!! If your partner has the required compassion, understanding he would appear to be the most beautiful human in the world even in his sixties and seventies. His/her wrinkles would make them appear even more beautiful. After all life Is not measured by the number of times you slept together but the little sweet moments like the first salary after marriage, first movie,first bouquet of flowers,first fight and then being all sorry about it, first financial crunch,forgetting your anniversary and then making up for it ,your first experiment with cooking to impress your partner,the first long drive , your first baby…etc. What is life without all these?